Lesson: You Can Really Enjoy Florida Fairly Safely ...

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Another magical morning begins with birds chirping this Saturday, 31 March 2019, in the lush, sunny, tropical, enchanted paradise that is St Petersburg, Florida, U.S.A., and we are about to be treated to another day of exciting golf, starting with Mr. Tiger Woods battling Mr. Rory McIlroy mano y mano and only one can emerge victorious to continue the quest for the World Golf Championship in Dell Match Play at Austin Country Club in Texas. And I'm excited to try my hand at sports writing and challenge my brain. This is my first attempt, so please feel free to scroll through anything that doesn't interest you. 

Thankful we are for this day. Dooing our American Yoga outside with Scoob E Dooby D Doge (the D stands for Doo) who avails himself in a big way of all nature in MeMaw's tiny tropical jungle yard here on the west coast of Florida. This big dog trapped in a little royal Italian dog loves the wind a cold front brings. He'll stand with his regal Roman nose sniffing into the wind for dog hours, which are actually minutes, and then he'll lay down like the Sphinx (see photo slideshows below please), if the Sphinx were sniffing up a sandstorm and not staring straight ahead with no nose as it has for centuries. 

I try not to complain about our Sunshine State other than snakes, but why did it have to be snakes, and so many things that look like snakes? ... And bugs and rodents, oh my. I don't mind the seemingly millions of little lizards, but I fear the alligators that look like Dinosaurs in person if you stumble upon them, and can and have outrun and eaten people to death. Have you ever run into a possum in the middle of the night with your flashlight? It is not a pretty sight; it's like The Hunchback of Svengoolie out of Nowhere. Have you ever made a trap out of an old plastic jar to catch those bees that eat your house? YES! Really! Bees that eat your house! It's more funny and less scary now that I've moved, but still. And those bees aren't even the worst of the bugs in Florida. Just DEET up and try to forget about it. Have you ever heard the whoosh of grass as a big, black, garden snake slithers away from you because "it's more scared of you than you are of it"? That whoosh crescendos to the volume of a gas grill igniting Whoomph! the instant you spy the slithering serpent. That leaves me shuddering with the hair standing up on the back of my neck for hours.Why did I inherit Dad's fear of snakes? I've seen all four deadly poisonous snakes indigenous to North America in the jungles of Florida (I'm nearly certain because when you meet a coral snake in person it's difficult to remember their red and black rhyme, and you're not moving in closer to make sure what color his nose is anyway, but there's no mistaking a rattler, or a cotton mouth when you startle one and he rears up his head and hisses at you, revealing long white fangs in a big white mouth, or the distinctive color of a copperhead) and still I can't stand those stupid black garden snakes. And snake season started here this year in February! February! That's not much of a Winter Snake Break. 

But Spring has sprung and MeMaw is enjoying playing with her new hose minder, Scoob E is enjoying walks in the wind, and I am covered in DEET with a bit of Chanel to feel a little pretty and elegant no matter what because life's too short ...Why not feel like Princess Grace or Miss Jacqueline Bouvier whether you're doing dishes, scrubbing floors, taking care of Mom and Scoob and their beautiful Doge Gardens. Plus we got great golf starting on Wednesday this week. Wednesday! So we are ever so grateful. Scoob E enjoys the wind two or three times a day on short walks due to his tiny big heart condition. Being Bolognese, he loves big, he loves to eat and is immensely charming and lovable. It's not an Italian stereotype if it's nice and it's true, is it? But Scoob's actual heart muscle has a murmur, so he doesn't get to march atop the table eating his royal heart out; even his treats must be doctor approved. And several short walks are better for the little bugger's ticker his doc says, so that's what His Royal Doge gets.

Doing my best to stay positive, the least judgmental person you'll ever meet because who am I to throw the first stone, and the product of a never say never home (Go Mr. Tiger! Just Please Don't Win The Par 3 Contest at Augusta...), but, and there's always a butt, this weekend I revised my resolution to never date again unless maybe if in an alternate universe Sir Nick Faldo asked. However, Friday during the Dell-WGC in Texass was the day I said never ever will I date again, not even if due to some zany circumstance Sir Nick were to ask. Because what the what with your match play commentary, Sir Nick - you work with Mr. Jim Bones Mackay covering the same matches for Golf Channel for more than a year, and you know you're 6'3" but you're not sure if Bones is taller than you? Was that supposed to be funny, because it seemed really mean and narcissistic. You covered Mr. Bones caddying for Mr. Phil Mickelson for years and maybe you think he's taller than you? What a wanker. Jeepers. And Mr. Keegan Bradley wins a hard fought match over someone who's going home anyway and your comment to Mr. Keegan is that he could have "Negotiated" to make it easier on himself. Well I never. Although I did ask one of the British PGA Tour Pros whom Mom and me met on our way to The Open last summer if Sir Nick could be as nice as he seems now on TV when as a competitor he was, let's politely say, crafty in his intimidating strategy. A leopard does not change his selfish spots, the British pro responded. Still, I gave Sir Nick the benefit of the doubt. "Negotiate." Negotiate! Is that how you get a great Ryder Cup Record, half dozen Major wins, British title, primo broadcasting job and successful development firm? Oh. Development. Of course you Negotiate. Sigh. The end of an era. ... but the makings of a decent epiphany and great new no dating policy for me. ... The one exception being Mr. Mel Brooks of America, who can't be more than half a decade older than Sir Nick. I've heard it's a party every time Mr. Brooks walks in his front door. A goy can dream...

It's not entirely Sir Nick's fault I've lost faith in our fellow man. Mr. Nice Guy Matt Kuchar didn't do anyone any favors when he forgot what $50,000 means to most people. I don't know what happened there in Mexico after Mr. Kuchar's win, but it was nice to see him eventually really reward the local caddy who helped him win there. Coincidentally, $50k is almost exactly what my ex ran up on my credit cards about the minute after I declared I'd filed for divorce. I'd been wondering till then how America could be in a credit card crisis as surely people by now have learned not to buy things they can't afford, and then I learned about surprise expenses firsthand when I went from debt of 0 to $50,000 in the blink of a divorce. If I'm still alive when I finish paying off the ex's revenge credit card debt, I will have paid off a mortgage for a very nice house I never got to have. But divorce costs so much because it's worth it, as the wealthy tell me with a laugh. Ha Ha! Yes, good one. Sigh.

Sir Nick is in good company with fella's I kicked off my dance card this week: I burned bridges with an Alaska/Florida tech millionaire who couldn't stop calling from Alaska to tell me what millionaire present he'd just bought himself because he's a millionaire like a miniature millionaire steam engine or a bunch of Oozies like his other millionaire buddies buy and how much fun it is to be a millionaire. And how he couldn't wait to take me to his favorite millionaire restaurant upon his return to Florida, The Melting Pot. I was leaning toward "maybe," just to be polite. Except I don't eat dairy, nor the non-olive oil the Pot uses to cook. And any decent millionaire or only child would know the place to eat in the Tampa/St. Pete area is Bern's Steakhouse, which costs just a bit more than the Pot, not the $100 meal this millionaire said he'd be fonduing, and which he insisted would impress me and expectedly inspire all manner of gratitude from me. My parents taught me it's gauche to talk about money, but this smart guy will never understand the terms fixed and negative income. His millionaire conversations were fascinating, but eventually I cut them shorter and shorter to get back to doing dinner dishes, cleaning the kitchen and dining room, scrubbing floors, and pulling weeds and whatnot for the rest of my life. So thank you, no; I'll take a hard pass on that Melting Pot invite now.     

Friday was the breaking point thanks to English nobility who could buy and sell this Yank and now I well and truly am done dating. No, I'm not a lesbian like our neighbor suggested. I have loved and lost and finally learned my lesson never to do that again. In reminiscing with our neighbor, we did learn that we knew a lot of the same bad asses, and I did frequent a local lounge way before I was a teen known as Harold's Knife and Gun Club to play pinball with my Dad after fishing in his little boat or off the Jack's Bait and Tackle Dock depending on what was in season, or hanging with friends at The Johns Pass Aquarium and Dolphin Show, but that's only because that's what Dad and I always did, not because Mom and me were bad asses like our neighbor tried to convince me after WGC-Dell Match Play Friday night. I just liked hanging out with Dad no matter where, and after learning shuffle bowling and enough about pool and billiards to know I would never master those in the myriad of bars Dad took me to in the factory town we're both from in New Jersey, I thought nothing of enjoying a great time with Dad in the roughest bars in any town. It's not what you might think - Dad owned the most successful insurance agency in our small town up North so he would come home from his office, pick me up, and head back out to the bars where many of his old and new clients happened to be after 5 p.m. weekdays and sometimes after breakfast or fishing on weekends too. Unfortunately that made Mom, who was born in New York City, and me more oblivious, trusting or naive rather than badass. I'm not sure whether to be sorry or grateful that I realize this only after we lost Dad last year. 

So it's mostly but not entirely Sir Nick's fault that today I'm definitely done dating. Always I loved hanging out with Dad and his pals, and always I wanted to be in Mr. Sinatra's Rat Pack, or graduate from Dad's to  my own with my contemporaries. I was taught to believe in the Golden Rule, now incorporated and expanded into the principles of The First Tee. NBC Sports Gold and GolfPass however seem to defy everything inclusive about golf, making it more unattainable and interrupting great golf as they inundate us with their commercial messages about how they're giving back to golf fans, who must subscribe to these services now. How many First Tee kids can pay $15 for Mr. Rory's exclusive stream plus $15 a month for NBC's exclusive stream. We can't. It's why I eat only every other day. And that can make you a bit cranky, jaded and disgusted, which makes it very easy to never date again. That is how you boldly go where no one has gone before. On the bright side, I'm only two (or four pounds for leeway insurance) pounds away from my New Year's Resolution to lose 10 pounds. 

And you shouldn't bite the hand that feeds you basic cable golf for a monthly fee too, especially after the many mighty magical moments they sent over the airwaves Wednesday, Thursday and Friday from Austin Country Club. Like the second round second shot at the Par 4 10th of Mr. Tiger against Mr. Snedeker with Mr. T holding his club upside down while on his knees to knock his ball out from under a bush and onto the green to save par and tie the hole. Mom, Scoob and me rewound the heck out of that one because we could not believe what we were seeing. Even Mr. Sneds smiled at that one. Snedeker, Snedeker, Snedeker, Dad loved to say. Or Mr. T at the 13th on Friday holing it from the fairway for a Tiger Roar. Most golf fans have been missing those Tiger Roars that we used to hear all the time back in the day. And as always, we've been enjoying golf history lessons, for instance about World Golf Hall Of Fame Members Harvey Penick, Tom Kite and Ben Crenshaw, all members of Austin Country Club, which also is giving us great vistas during breaks in the battles on the course. 

While dooing chores and American Yoga with Scoob E outside before Saturday morning's WGC Match Play, I congratulate myself with a smile on my still unwavering commitment to my new no dating policy. With a fistful of defiant daisy weeds with their tenacious long black hurty seeds that attack Scoob E and anyone in long pants in one hand, and in the other hand a bag of loquats and other things from off the ground that attract flies, I also am thinking I fought the lawn and the lawn won as I head toward the trash can. As I pass the tall white plastic fence separating the garden work area with air conditioner equipment, I turn to see where Scoob might be and immediately spot a black snake with his head raised to about where my knees had just passed and his body stretched back along near the entire fence to the house. I froze as I formulated a plan and my breathing deepened by 100 percent or so - I don't know if that's the right percent as I'm not a morning person, don't drink coffee and don't enjoy math as much as I should. Since Scoob was nowhere in sight and likely enjoying himself elsewhere in his MeMaw's gardens, I backed out of the work area toward the front gate as gracefully and quietly as I could while keeping an eye on the snake in our grass and got out and got rid of the trash. I then crossed the driveway, took the sidewalk along the front of the house around the corner to the standing stones garden his MeMaw built, went through the other tall white plastic gate and called for Scoob E, who again was nowhere in sight. I walked the length of the back of the house again and around the corner still Scoob E was nowhere in sight. What if it was an Indigo black snake: Do they eat dogs? They eat poisonous snakes. I once saw one eat a massive rattlesnake at the National Park on the Atlantic Ocean side of Florida at Ponce Inlet. Having no idea of what I was seeing, I stopped at the ranger station to ask what the heck?? The ranger all but cried when she explained because she'd never seen that in her 14 years at the park, but she always hoped she would. Again I call Scoob and he appears, looks at the gate where I just exited, then runs right past where the snake was and toward me courageously, blissfully, obliviously. Snakes, why did it have to be snakes I wonder as we make our way through MeMaw's Magical Garden to watch really great golf and nature again from the safety of our Television Room Terrarium. Please don't give me that ecosystem circle of life crap this early in the morning. I didn't even get to finish my American Yoga yet. Why did it literally AND figuratively Have to be snakes? Now every twig, frond and hose on the ground look like snakes. Sigh. 

Saturday morning the other big story is Tiger versus Rory, with all their nifty highlights from Wednesday, Thursday and Friday for good measure. Everybody is happy to see That Ol' Tiger Magic, but Poor Rory can't sink a putt to save his life and misses right all morning to sink to 3 down to Mr. T through 10, 11, 12. Poor Mr. Paul Casey this Saturday morning can't stop himself from hitting in the water a few times, allowing Champion Golfer of the Year Signore Francesco Molinari to go 2 up, then 4 up, then birdie 14 to win that match. Mr. Kevin Kiz Kisner with some very nice golf quickly put away his morning opponent, Mr. H. Li. I would like to see more of the battle of the giant Mr. Marc Leishman and the tiny Mr. Louis Oosthuizen, who is slaying at 2 up through 16. At 13, Mr. Kevin Na does another fast walk on his birdie putt to move from 1 down to tied with Olympic Gold Medal winner Mr. Justin Rose of England. At 16, Mr. Oo sinks a lengthy and difficult birdie to defeat Mr. Leishman, and maybe rest up as his afternoon opponent Mr. Kiz said earlier. At 13, Mr. T finally gives 1 back to Mr. Rory. 

Then on the 294 yard Par 4 13th, the rain and wind comes hard off the water all down the left and Mr. T sends his layup past the hole and over the green. Mr. Rory drives the green and hit it close. On 11, Senor Sergio Serge Garcia hits a heck of a long putt to finally take the lead, then puts a tee shot in the water to end up tied with Mr. Branden Grace again. Mr. T eventually makes par, but Mr. Rory finally makes a birdie to get to 1 down. At the Par 4 14th with water down both sides to start and all the way down the left, the rain is stopping but the wind is picking up and both Mr. Rory and Mr. T are in the fairway, but Mr. Rory is in a divot and his ball spins toward the hole then down off the front of the green. Inexplicably, Mr. T does the same but just a few feet to the left. Mr. Rory chips it nearly to the hole and Mr. T gives it to him. Mr. Rory does not extend the same courtesy to Mr. T who sinks his par putt to retain his 1 up lead, and who likely will not forget Mr. Rory's lack of courtesy. 

Mr. T hits it into the gallery on the left at 15, and then onto the middle of the green way right of the hole. Mr. Rory from the fairway shoots on and beyond the gusting green. Equally inexplicably Mr. T leaves his birdie putt to win the hole way short. Mr. Rory chips quite close to the hole. Mr. T takes another fast walk to retrieve his long clutch par putt to remain 1 up. The Dane Mr. Lucas Bjerregaard wins 2 up over Mr. Henrik Stenson, who is as shocked as anyone at the loss. At the Par 5 16th, Mr. T plugs his tee shot in a bunker, and again from the fairway for reasons we would never understand hits into the rough just above a greenside bunker he must stand in to get a shot at the ball, but flys it up and over the other side of the green, across a cart path and into the railroad ties holding back the forest, from which he'll get no relief. Yikes. Mr. Tyrrell Hatton after talking himself all the way around Austin Country Club to 3 down at 15 concedes to Olympic Bronze Medalist Mr. Matt Kuchar. Kuch. U.S.A.! Meanwhile back at 16, Mr. Rory takes an unplayable and returns to the rough above the bunker to hit his fifth shot into the rough above the next greenside bunker and bloop it rolls back into the sand, where he finally chips it close to the hole and concedes, propelling Mr. T back to 2 up. At 18, Mr. Na had two putts to win 2 over Mr. Rose but finished in style with a stylish birdie on the way to his afternoon match with Senor Molinari. 

Off the Par 3 17th, Mr. T underestimates the wind and just gets it up and over the penalty area in front of the green. Mr. Rory sends his ball safely to the front left of the green for a long shot at birdie at the pin near the right edge. Mr. T chips to the middle of the green, and Mr. Rory burns the right edge of the cup for a short par after what looked like a birdie for a very long time. About 13 feet for par wins Mr. T the match and the crowd goes wild and Mr. T heaves a heavy sigh as he prepares to meet the Dane in the afternoon match. At 18, Mr. Serge is back to 1 up on Mr. Grace and hits it into a deep fairway bunker. With that advantage, Mr. Grace hits it into the left gallery for reasons beyond our comprehension. Mr. Serge gets it to the middle of the green, while Mr. Grace cozies up closer to the cup for a chance to win the hole and force a playoff. Mr. Serge sends his birdie putt way past the hole, as does Mr. Grace. Mr. Grace misses his par putt and Mr. Serge makes his to advance to the afternoon Quarterfinals against Mr. Kuchar.

In Saturday's Quarterfinals, Mr. Kiz gets 1 up on Mr. Oosthuizen at the 1st, and Mr. Oo answers at 2 with a birdie to tie that hole and that match. Mr. Na fast walks in his birdie at the 1st to go 1 up on Senor Molinari. I'm going to call that Na Walking from now on. Remember that this is where you first heard it called the Na Walk. I like that because it sounds like Narwhal and I love marine mammals. And who doesn't love Mr. Narwhal in the movie Elf? 

On 3, Mr. Kiz gets back to 1 up on Mr. Oo. Mr. T hits his first Quarterfinal shot into a left fairway bunker, and Mr. Bjerregaard drives it close to the green where the pin awaits near the front. On 4, Mr. Oo again ties Mr. Kiz in a great back and forth battle. From the front slope of the bunker, Mr. T hits it into the fairway just in front of the green. Mr. B's second goes just past the pin. Mr. T's chip nearly goes in but he settles for par when Mr. B gives him the putt. Mr. B makes his birdie and goes 1 up on Mr. T in what must be one of the most surreal matches the Dane has ever played.

Mr. Kiz at 5 just misses a birdie, and Mr. Oo makes his short birdie to go 1 up. From 2 fairway, Mr. B stuffs it into the pin and Mr. T spins it quite a ways back in front of the hole. At 3 Signore Molinari makes a long birdie, and Mr. Na just misses one and is 1 down. Off the 4th, Signore Molinari hits it right at the hole, and Mr. Na hits it way way right of the hole. At 2, Mr. T's long birdie putt gets close and is conceded. Mr. B misses his birdie putt and it is not conceded, but he makes his par and is still 1 up. At 6, Mr. Oo just misses his birdie putt, giving Mr. Kiz the chance to get even again and he does! At the Par 4 3rd, Mr. T sends it far down the middle of the fairway. From a bit farther back in the fairway, Mr. B hits it into the left of the green, which sends it back toward the hole and well past it. Mr. T must know a bit more about the left of the green as his shot there spins almost back to the hole. Meanwhile, with another longish birdie at 4, Signore Molinari goes 2 up over Mr. Na, who needs right now to step up his game before he gets too far back. From about 30 feet, Mr. B's birdie attempt is headed right for the hole but runs out of steam and is conceded for par. With only about 8 feet for birdie to tie the match, Mr. T Na Walks in another one. 

Over at 7, Mr. Oo makes birdie to go 1 up again on Mr. Kiz. Mr. Serge blows a birdie putt and after the 1st Quarterfinal hole is tied with Mr. Kuch. At the Par 3 4th, Mr. T's ball barely bounces before it rolls close to the hole. Mr. B's ball lands on the back of the green well behind the hole and stops, leaving a long way for him to birdie and likely stay tied, but his putt loses momentum and peels off to the right. Then he makes Mr. T tap in his birdie to take the lead for the first time in this match. Uh oh and let's regroup and win the rest of the holes is what I'd be thinking if I were Mr. B. No pressure, as always. At the Par 4 5th, Mr. T sends it down the middle, and Mr. B is just a bit back and right. At the 8th, Mr. Oo has a rare birdie miss giving Mr. Kiz a chance to stay 1 back and he does, with a clutch par. Mr. B gets on the green at 5, but not as close as he should be to the pin. With about another 8 footer for birdie, Mr. T pours it in and goes 3 up. At 6, Signore Molinari wins his 5th consecutive hole to go 4 up over Mr. Na, who now really needs to get something going. Mr. Kiz hits over the green into the rough, but Mr. Oo hits it into the ravine right of the green for a bigger spot of bother at 9. Mr. Kiz fails to make par giving Mr. Oo a chance to tie with bogie at 9 but he misses, and again that match is tied. 

At 6, from leaves next to the cart path, Mr. B hits it back on the fairway below the front of the green. Mr. T from the fairway bounces it off the left of the green in what looks like a great kick until it zooms by the hole and off the right of the green into a bunker. Again Signore Molinari makes birdie, his sixth in a row, to get to 5 over Mr. Na. Back at 6, Mr. B chips his third just to the front of the green, then leaves his par putt quite short. Mr. T gets his bunker shot closer for birdie and just misses his fourth bird in a row, giving Mr. B a chance to tie if he can just make his par. Mr. B Na Walks it in and gets a reprieve and perhaps a personal momentum shift. 

At the Par 3 7th, Mr. T at 2 up hits it to the back of the green and it spins just a bit back toward the front pin for a 50 foot or so birdie. Mr. B stuffs his tee shot close to the pin. Speaking of momentum, Mr. Na gets to Texas Two-Step his Na Walk because his birdie is Texas long, and he ties a hole with Senor Molinari for a change and a chance. Mr. T comes up short and Mr. B's short bird just lips out. Then Mr. T's par putt lips out for bogie, Gasp!, giving Mr. B the point to get to 1 back. At the 5th, Mr. Kuch has a good chance to break his tie with Senor Serge. 

At 8, Mr. B sends it down the fairway, and Mr. T sends it into the oaks on the left. One up at the Par 3 11th, Mr. Oo is taking some time to figure out the wind and sends his ball over the flag in front into the rough behind the green. Mr. Kiz hits his to the fringe left of the hole. On 5, Mr. Kuch goes 1 up for the first time over Mr. Serge. From the old oak forest along the 8th, Mr. T hits a tree that sends his ball to the middle of the fairway. Mr. B sends his ball over the flag to the fringe all the way at the back of the green. Mr. Oo at 11 chips right at the water into the fringe, which somehow sends the ball left toward the hole. At the 9th, Mr. Na Na Walks in another par to remain 5 down to Signore Molinari. Mr. T finally from the fairway stuffs the ball in close to the pin, leaving a short putt for par and a chance to retain his lead. Mr. Kiz from the fringe cozies it close enough for a concession, and Mr. Oo still has four or five feet for par to tie and knocks it in to remain 1 up. Mr. B's birdie putt at the 8th doesn't have the oomph to get there but is conceded for par, and Mr. T makes his par to tie and keep his 1 up lead. 

With the rare honor at the Par 4 9th, Mr. B makes the longest drive down the fairway yet this afternoon. Mr. T hits it over the right fairway bunker but doesn't make it out of the rough to catch the speedy slope like Mr. B did. From the 12th fairway, Mr. Kiz sends it over the cart path and through the carts on the right. Mr. Oo lays up in the fairway in front of the green. Mr. T uses the right slope of the green to get his ball on its way to the hole, though it remains well right. Mr. B from a fairway divot comes up well short of the hole. Mr. Kiz has a birdie putt from off the green at 12 to win the hole but sends it a bit past, and he remains 1 down to Mr. Oo. Mr. B sends his long birdie putt well past the hole at 9. Mr. T's birdie putt comes up a bit short in very un-Tiger-like fashion. Mr. B makes his long par putt and does not concede. So Mr. T holes it to remain 1 up. At 6 Mr. Kuch bogies, followed by Mr. Serge with a bogie to tie the hole and remain 1 down. Mr. Na hits it in the water at 11, and Signore Molinari answers with another long curvy birdie to go up 6. It's not looking great for Mr. Na, poor little bugger. 

At the Par 4 10th, Mr. B again with the honor hits it down the middle of the fairway. Mr. T's drive rolls past Mr. B's ball. Down 1 from the back fringe for birdie at 13, Mr. Kiz curves it right into the hole for the longest putt of the week at 13. Neato. Mr. Oo makes his much shorter bridie putt to tie the hole and remain 1 up. Mr. B shoots his ball right at the pin on 10 leaving a short birdie putt. Mr. T spins his ball back away from the hole, leaving a super long birdie putt. At 7, Mr. Serge's par putt to win the hole and get back into a tie goes left a few inches, and with the toe of his putter he haphazardly lips out for bogie before Mr. Kuchar has a chance to concede the tiny one that turned into a big mistake and 2 down for Mr. Serge. And Mr. Kuch even told an official he would have conceded if Mr. Serge had given him the chance and still would concede if an exception could be made, but no joy for Mr. Serge as rules are rules, and his emotions let the rules get the best of him. Or vice versa: En Espana, emotions run simmer to boil - he was called a lot of things, but the late great Senor Seve Ballesteros never was called emotionless as he played his way into the World Golf Hall of Fame. Mr. B at 1 down, no pressure, has a birdie to win the 10th hole and tie the match and how 'bout that - he jars it and he's again tied with Tiger, if I may. 

With things just not going his way today, Senor Serge bogies the Par 4 8th, and takes a wicked swipe at the sky with his putter as he plunges 3 down to Mr. Kuch. I think Senor Serge learned his lesson overseas that you can't beat up a green with your putter if you want to stay in the game, but if I'm correct about the new 2019 Rules of Golf, you can beat the hell out of the air all you want. 

Who would have thought again it would be Mr. B with the honor off the Par 3 11th, and he sends his tee shot into the water. Rats. No one was liking how this match was going except for Denmark and a few others, but no one likes to see that splash. Geez. Mr. Serge has a tendency to hit the water when he's in a state and he's certainly in one now so we'll likely have to see a few more splashes this afternoon. Mr. T again hits the back left of the green way over the Dyeabolically tempting front pin. From the Drop Zone, Mr. B has better luck with the back right fringe, which kicks his ball way back and a bit beyond the pin. Mr. T has worse luck with the fringe and sends his putt way beyond the hole. Still, Mr. B fails to make par, and Mr. T again is in the lead by 1. These are all now 1 point matches and this is Great Golf. 

At 13 Signore Molinari sinks another birdie to win his match against Mr. Na. Aww. "It was playing tricky this afternoon," master of understatement Signore Molinari told Golf Channel after his win. 

At 9 Tee, Senor Serge (of emotion) sends his shot way over the right gallery. At 12, Mr. Tiger finally has the honor again and hits it through the fairway into the rough. Mr. B sends it past trees, spectators and golfcarts, oh my, toward grandstands. Mr. Oo concedes Mr. Kiz's putt at 15 and makes a valiant chip that nearly holes and nearly halves but misses, and Mr. Kiz is back into a tie with Mr. Oo. 

From the rough around the fairway bunker at 12, Mr. T slips and hits it again into the rough. That's okay, Mr. B is  complying with a ruling out from behind the temporary obstruction of a corporate hospitality area next to a service road to take a decent drop and still he hits it way right and still short. Oh dear. Over at 16, Mr. Oo sends his second through the green into the back fringe, and Mr. Kiz sends his second through the green and into a bunker. Mr. B chips toward the hole but hits the front fringe. Oof. Mr. T chips from the rough just onto the green but short of the hole. Mr. B makes his birdie, and Mr. T must do so as well to tie the hole and knocks it in to remain 1 up in the match. Mr. Oo concedes Mr. Kiz's birdie putt, then misses his much longer try to go 1 down again to Mr. Kiz. Senor Serge still clearly is super mad at himself but wins the 10th hole to get back to 2 down.   

At the Par 4 13th where the shoreline down the left and serious water on the right really start, Mr. T hits it through the green up the back rough almost to the grandstands. Mr. B elects to lay up and hits his third very close to the flag. Mr. Kiz at the Par 3 17th stuffs it to just over a foot from the hole. To answer, Mr. Oo hits it left where it bounces out of the rough, onto the rocks and into the ravine, ending that match with Mr. Kiz victorious. U.S.A.! Yea! WooHoo Aiken! "I'll be excited if I can get through and play for the title," Mr. Kiz tells Gold Channel after that win. It's not over yet. 

Mr. T chips into the greenside rough, which kicks the ball all the way across to inches from the hole at the front of 13 green. They both make their putts and Mr. Tiger remains 1 up. At the the Par 4 14th with the honor, Mr. T threads the water sending it way down the fairway. Mr. B hits it short of Mr. T and it rolls toward the rough. At 11 it's all pars and Mr. Kuch remains 2 up over Mr. Serge. Of Emotions. Mr. Bones reports that Senor Serge told him he has apologized to everyone since he was only mad at himself, which we all know is about the maddest you can be. 

At the Par 5 12th, Senor Serge smacks that ball way down the fairway. Then he hits it a bit short of the green and indeed just misses a duck before his ball bounces bloop into the water, just as I predicted right after Hole 7. Yikes. It's not an announcer's curse if you're typing rather than talking, and I believe the new 2019 Rules of Golf  back me up on that. At 14, again Mr. T hits it through the green, off the back and into the fringe he goes. Mr. B sends his effort also to the back fringe, then beyond the hole, then almost in, but he concedes Mr. T's putt and remains 1 back. After hitting to the left of the green from the DZ, Senor Serge sends it past the hole and concedes it to Mr. Kuch, who is now up 3 again. 

Mr. T again from the fairway hits over the flagstick, but this time stays on the green. Mr. B from the fairway hits it to the right of 15 pin at the front of the green. At the Par 4 13th, Mr. Kuch drives the green to hit the ball off the grandstands. Senor Serge now down 3 hits it way right over the gallery and under a golfcart on a dirt path, oh boy. Mr. T has almost a 40 foot putt for birdie and it curves a few inches left and back of the hole at 15. Mr. B has a shorter putt that's still long for bird but misses by just inches and taps in for par. Now Mr. T must make a footlong or so putt to tie and remain 1 up. 

Three down with his second shot at 13, Senor Serge chips it so close to the hole but it misses by just inches right to a length that might be conceded. Mr. T drove the fairway at 16 as did Mr. B, but his rolled halfway down a hill, leaving an awkward second shot. Mr. Kuch was unable to chip in from the back of the green, and his lead drops to 2. Mr. B hits it on 16 green, but way left and a bit behind the hole. Mr. T follows suit but even farther left, meaning he'll be giving Mr. B a pretty good read. But oh again Mr. T doesn't hit it and likely will have to settle for birdie. At 14, Senor Serge hits it over the green and fringe and into the rough near the grandstands, and Mr. Kuch hits it just by the hole. Mr. B gives the ball a nice hit and away it goes down into the hole for eagle and he wins the hole, playing himself back into a tie. Wow! What a putt! 

Senor Serge chips it into the fringe greenside but it doesn't slow and rolls well past the hole. Mr. Kuch sinks a long birdie, as he is want to do, to take a 3 up lead over Senor Serge again as they head to 15.  

On the Par 3 17th with the honor, Mr. B hits the front of the green again, but this time it slows as it bounces toward the hole in back. Mr. T proceeds to hit a very Tiger shot way inside Mr. B's, so this time he'll get a pretty good read as well as a good shot at winning back the lead. Mr. B holes his putt and the crowd sort of goes wild, not Tiger Roar wild mind you, but good on them and Mr. B. Mr. T makes birdie too and they remain tied as they head to 18. Good on them. I expect they'll both be driving that Par 4 green. 

With the honor again, Mr. B does grab a driver and sends the ball way down the fairway where it rolls into the rough in sight of the green. Mr. T drives it down the center and it rolls into the rough a few yards behind Mr. B. Could we be heading into overtime or will one of these contenders chip it in to win? We all love seeing that! Back on 16, Mr. Kuch sends it over a hill on the green for birdie but it doesn't make it to the hole. Senor Sergio has only five or six feet for birdie to win the hole and cut the lead to 2 as they head to 17. 

Mr. T and his caddy Mr. Joe Lacava take a long walk and look over the two bunkers and rough guarding the pin at the front of 18 and he hits it into the greenside bunker anyway. Mr. B manages to stuff it on the front of the green and it still rolls well down the hill. Well don't think for a minute that Mr. T can't hole his bunker shot for birdie. He doesn't, but it's a great bunker shot that's only a bit short of the hole before it just stops. No pressure on Mr. B as he putts for the win over his childhood golf hero, whom he just met today. Surreal I said before and I'll say it again. But the birdie is not to be and Mr. B has a tap in that's conceded, and Mr. T likely will knock it in for overtime. Gasp. What? It lips out and Mr. T is going home not a winner. Super Surreal all around. Mr. Bjerregaard gets to play either Mr. Kuch or Senor Serge Sunday, and it will be Mr. Kuch who retains his 2 up lead to beat Mr. Serge, who just didn't stop beating himself up or apologizing after his mistake back on the 7th. That's not the type of golf memory you want and why it's so important to be able to quickly learn your lesson and then forget your failings in golf. Easier said than done, to be sure.

As in life, as well. From golf I have learned a little bit about how to remember and forget, and I only play putt putt golf and really it's been too long since our last match at the Polynesian Putter. 

Sunday morning after Scoob has his face washed, eats his meds, gets two brushings in one, and I get on my DEET, Tea Tree, clean teeth, clothes, camera, keys, bags and Chanel because you can't buy class but you sure can do your best to wear it well, we head outside for American Yoga including gratitude and full use of the tropical paradise for Scoob E. We are all grateful to be looking forward to a Sunday of WGC match play after what's already been a magical weekend of golf that started Wednesday. Wednesday! Any time golf starts Wednesday is great. 

As I smile in self-congratulation of figuratively crossing Sir Nick Faldo off my fantasy list, reaffirming my good choice to end my dating days altogether, I reflect on my neighbor trying to convince me that Mom and me are bad asses and I need not give up dating. Easy for him to say. Ha ha! Literally 100% of the men I've spent any amount of time keeping company with after my teens were pathological liars at best and certified sociopaths at worst. Thank God the neighborhood gypsy handyman who robbed us was picked by Mom because I can't be responsible for unleashing another scourge on this family. I was thinking yesterday it's very freeing to swear off men. We never say never in this house, but for this we should make an exception. Snakes, why did it have to be snakes. Literally and figuratively. And first thing in the morning.

Not many loquats on the ground so I round the corner toward the garbage and hesitate at the white fence where I saw the big black garden snake yesterday. My chest bobs forward a bit more each time and I finally get a view around the fence and yep, there he is all the way back in the corner. I run past the air conditioning unit and get my camera out and on but get no good photos or videos. I do yell at this snake that he cannot live here, and he must move on to another yard. But he has simply slithered under the fence into Mom's hibiscus. At least she likes garden snakes. Snakes I mutter as I go out the gate to the garbage can, why did it have to be snakes, crossing the driveway, down and around the sidewalk in front of the house, hitting the start of Mom's standing stones path to the other gate, go in and call for Scoob, who again is standing all the way back at the opposite gate where I'd just left with the normal morning garbage. A new morning route obviously is in order.

Okay, Inside! It's time to tune in great golf, and WFCF 88.5 Flagler College Radio from St. Augustine on iHeart Radio on the iPhone. But due to snake drama, now it's time to almost run out the front door to the driveway to tell Mom to Doo Good and Have Fun at her choir and church and fete, Love You and Be Safe. And her stupid snake is back and will not listen to me when I tell it to move along to a new home because this cannot be his home. And does she have a camera, because I want a photo of her in these choir shirts someone painted for the fete which Mom will be wearing over her long sleeve Lenten purple shirt a la Sheldon on "The Big Bang Theory." 

Now golf! Being done with men, I no longer have to pay attention to everything Sir Nick Faldo says in his sexy smooth accent. I prefer the accent of the younger Sean Connery James Bonds, not the Never Say Never Sir Sean Connery Bond though. So grateful for great golf. Semifinals! Yea!

First off the tee in the first pairing of the first match today, Mr. Kiz drives it way down the fairway to set himself up with a short chip to get to a birdie putt, and Signore Molinari cannot find a fairway to save his life and simply concedes the first hole. He comes back at the second to tie the match and they're both shooting from the fairway at 3 now that everyone's settled in there. He chips inside of Mr. Kiz, still very far right of the left pin but he'll get a good read. 

Mr. Kuch in his lucky ski hat handily wins Hole 1 against Mr. Bjerregaard with a great shot onto the green at the pin from behind a tree in the rough. Mr. B sends his next tee shot into the rocks rimming the ravine left of the 2nd hole. That is a long way down if you lose your balance, but all is well and his ball hits the slope on the side of the green and rolls across toward the hole for birdie. Mr. Kiz just misses his long birdie. OH! And Signore Molinari makes his! YES! I love it when they go in. Signore Molinari is 1 up as they head to 4 Tee, where his shot bounces through the green and over the bunker to the hill of rough in back of the Par 3. So Mr. Kiz needs just to keep it on the green, and hits it into a mound at the front of the green and it slows over the subsequent mounds on the way to the hole until it gets to about the last one and rolls back a bit short of the pin. From the fringe off the back of 2, Mr. Kuch misses his long birdie putt by longer than you'd expect. Mr. B's birdie putt just burns the edge leaving a tap in to win the hole. Mr. Kuch's long par putt rolls way by the left of the hole, and Mr. B's bogie putt to win the hole lips out and away they go to 3 Tee with Mr. Kuch leading by 1, and he drives it way down the Par 4 fairway. Mr. B also hits the fairway, a nice improvement over the rough on the rocks at the last. Sadly, Signore Molinari's first shot out of the bunker behind 4 green rolls back into the bunker. His fourth at the Par 3 leaves a two putt for Mr. Kiz to win the hole, Signore Molinari concedes, and Mr. Kiz makes the putt anyway because he can. Neato. 

Mr. Kuch spins his ball onto the green toward the hole but leaves a good distance for birdie. Mr. B hits a bit inside and right of Mr. Kuch. Nice. One up at 3 and OH, Mr. Kuch just burns the right edge and his par is conceded. Mr. B just didn't hit it and it was in all the way. His par is conceded and it's on to 4 with Mr. Kuch still 1 up. 

At the Par 4 Hole 5, both Signore Molinari and Mr. Kiz hit the fairway. This time Signore Molinari hits it over the green into the rough on the way down to the back bunker. Mr. Kiz again hits it into the front of the green but it checks and stops well short of the hole. And Irish Ways has just started broadcasting great golf music in the background, soulful singers, pipes, concertina. Scoob E tweets to let Sir Nick and Mr. David Feherty know there's an hour of music from all over all their isles just starting courtesy of an ex-pat on Florida's Flagler College Radio via iHeartRadio. I'm nice. It's my kryptonite. I do have the strength, however, to turn down the volume on Sir Nick for the first time ever, and crank the Celtic music that we only get to enjoy for an hour on Sundays.

At the Par 3 Hole 4, Mr. Kuch hits it to the right of the green, far far away from the left pin. Mr. B hits it just a bit inside Mr. Kuchar's ball, giving himself a good read and outside chance of squaring the match. At the 5th, standing in the back bunker and swinging his club at near shoulder level like a baseball bat, Signore Molinari manages to land it just far enough on the green to let it roll to inches of the hole, which Mr. Kiz concedes. And WOW!, Mr. Kiz sinks his long birdie putt to go 1 up again like he was at the 1st. Brilliant!

Mr. Kuch sends another super long birdie putt well by at the 4th. Mr. B gets his closer and his par is conceded. Oh! Mr. Kuch misses his long par putt and the match is now tied! One up at the Par 5 6th, Mr. Kiz with the honor and the lead sends it down the fairway, and Signore Molinari follows suit. Are Signore Molinari's drives starting to catch up to Mr. Kiz's or is it just me? His next shot is well short of the green, so no matter. Mr. Kiz lays up even further back of the pin near the front of the green, a great strategy as he stuffs the ball into the pin from back there, giving Signore Molinari something to think about before his next shot. 

Tied at the 5th, both Mr. B then Mr. Kuch drive way down the narrow fairway. Mr. B's next shot stays well left of the hole. Mr. Kuch spins his off the back right of the green to well forward and right of the hole in the middle of the green. Again he'll have the longer birdie putt. Will he send it way by again or will he sink it?  

Signore Molinari checking out 6 green for his next shot picks up Mr. Kiz's ball and tosses it to him for birdie concession. You've got to love golf's sportsmanship. He then walks back to his ball, stuffs it into the pin and putts for his own birdie to tie the hole, leaving him still 1 behind Mr. Kiz and away they go to 7.

Meanwhile tied back at 5 with 30 and 50 foot birdie putts, Mr. Kuch leaves his a few feet short, and Mr. B misses winning the hole by inches. Ohhh. Mr. Kuchar makes his par and they remain tied. 

One up with the honor at the Par 3 7th, Mr. Kiz hits it over the front pin and gets a wee spin back, leaving him way way back. Signore Molinari somehow stuffs it in front of the Dyeabolical front pin. 

Mr. B hits it down the right fairway at 6, and Mr. Kuchar stripes it, leading to a a nice layup. Mr. B hits his second shot even farther right, but it looks nice and trampled by the gallery over there. Mr. Kuch pitches his as close to the pin as he has all day, leaving a good chance for birdie and the lead. Mr. B's third gets stuck in the fringe behind the green, but his next chip rolls inches right of the hole Oh!, all the way across the green. Aww. And Mr. Kuch sinks his birdie to go 1 up again. Yea! Swell match.

Mr. Kiz has a long way to go for birdie to retain his lead and his putt just sort of dies and peels off left at the end leaving him tied with Signore Molinari. But at the 8th Signore Molinari again sends his shot bouncing off the back of the green, while Mr. Kiz hits the left side of the green. 

With the honor and a lead of 1 at the Par 3 7th, Mr. Kuch sends it through the right of the green, leaving himself wide open for another tie with Mr. B. But Mr. B hits into the front greenside bunker. 

Signore Molinari's chip from behind the green cozies up to a dozen or so feet from the hole. From the left of the green, Mr. Kiz left himself a longer one that really needs to get in the hole for par and does so with conviction. Wow! Signore Molinari makes his par as well to tie the hole and the match remains tied as they stride to 9. 

Chipping from the rough atop the left greenside bunker at 7, Mr. Kuch sends his ball almost all the way across the green and into the front bunker. From the sand he hits the flagstick, which deflects the ball to inches from the hole. Nice hit. Also from the front bunker but with only his second shot, Mr. B stuffs it close to the pin and wins the hole and gets back into a tie with Mr. Kuch. Well played Mr. B.

Signore Molinari and Mr. Kiz are also tied, and both hit the fairway at the Par 4 9th. Signore Molinari hits first, but I swear he's still catching up with Mr. Kiz's drives, and flys it over the front right pin, but the ball remains on the green, leaving a long putt for birdie. Mr. Kiz hits it into the suel right of the green and should hole it if he wants to win the hole, but he cozies it up and par is conceded. Signore Molinari just didn't hit his birdie putt that was tracking all the way till it peeled right at the end, and another hole is tied. 

Now with the honor and tied at the 8th, Mr. B hits it on the fairway but it rolls into the right rough. Mr. Kuch hits it into the left rough, which kicks it back into the fairway. Ah golf, you magical, mysterious old so and so. Mr. Kuch's second shot bounces on the front of the green and rolls past the hole a bit. Mr. B powers it out of the rough to the front of the green and it rolls a bit toward the hole in back. 

Mr. B's long birdie putt at 8 comes up a bit short. Mr. Kuch just misses his birdie bid to the right and it rolls by a ways, but still inside Mr. B's par putt. Mr. B makes his par, picks up Mr. Kuch's ball and they remain tied. 

Also tied, Signore Molinari and Mr. Kiz both stripe the Par 4 10th fairway. Signore Molinari's second shot checks at the front of the green, well short of the flag. Mr. Kiz inexplicably does the same thing, just several feet left. Somebody's got to make a long birdie to break this tie surely. Mr. Kiz misses by a few inches left, and Signore Molinari with his chance to take the lead misses a bit farther right. He concedes Mr. Kiz's par and putts his own and still they are tied.   

Mr. B sends his drive down 9 to the bottom of the slope in front of the green and Mr. Kuch sends his about an inch further. Mr. B airmails the flag leaving a long birdie putt from behind the hole. Mr. Kuch looks to go at the flag and ends up with a better chance for birdie. Mr. B doesn't hit his birdie putt hard enough to lose his turn. With two putts to win the hole, Mr. Kuch's par is conceded and he takes the lead to the 10th.

Signore Molinari at the Par 3 11th with the flag across the water spins it off the fringe at the back of the green toward the hole for a change. Neat. Mr. Kiz spins his back even closer from behind the flag. Nice. Signore Molinari misses his birdie try to get out of a tie left and on beyond the hole. Mr. Kiz only misses by inches and his par is conceded. 

Mr. Kuch with the lead drives for reasons unknown into the rough right of the 10th fairway and so far below he can't see the green, while Mr. B stripes it down the middle. The fringe at the back of the green is the only thing that stops Mr. Kuch's blind second shot. Mr. B from the top of the hill at 10 can see the flag in the middle of the green and hits right at it, leaving a good chance for birdie to win the hole and tie the match and he does! Wow! 

The Par 5 12th is where the real water seems to start. Signore Molinari drives way down into a suel of the fairway, and Mr. Kiz sends his tee shot into the right fairway bunker, then lays it up from there. Signore Molinari's second ends up short and right of the green. Mr. Kiz on his third shot hits the green just right of the front hole. Holy moley! Signore Molinari's third bounces by the hole through the fringe off the green and bloop into the water. After a drop and a miss, Signore Molinari concedes the hole, and Mr. Kiz takes a lead to the 13th. 

Mr. B with the honor doesn't quite get his ball to the pin at the Par 3 11th. Mr. Kuch put his shot inside Mr. B's and it spins back a bit. Mr. B leaves his long putt a few feet short of the hole, while Mr. Kuch gets his within inches and that's two pars. 

Mr. Kiz with the honor and a lead of 1 at the Par 4 13th drives it into the gallery right of the hole. Incoming! Signore Molinari chooses an iron and lays up well short of the front pin location with water all down the left. Mr. Kiz chips to the hole and it rolls beyond the cup but not into the water. Signore Molinari misses his putt, giving Mr. Kiz's birdie chance a chance at winning another hole, but again Oh!, it just misses and it's another tie. 

At the 12th, again Mr. B and Mr. Kuch stripe it down the fairway. Mr. Kuch drives his second up toward the green, while Mr. B sends his over the cart path into the gallery on the right. Zoinks! He chips it onto the edge of the green and it rolls only a little bit toward the hole. Mr. Kuch putts from the front fringe to just a bit beyond the hole. Mr. B just misses birdie and putts for par, while Mr. Kuch makes his birdie and goes 1 up. 

From 14 fairway, Mr. Kiz at 1 up hits the green and the ball rolls to the back. Signore Molinari hits it on, through and down the back of the green again, then to the left of the hole, then misses his par putt. Mr. Kiz leaves his birdie putt well short again, but makes par to go 2 up with Signore Molinari's bogie. 

At the Par 4 13th with the honor and the lead, Mr. Kuch hits it through the right greenside gallery and over the cart path into another trampled area. Mr. B lays up in the fairway in front of the hole, then bravely shoots over the water right at the pin. From behind the cart path, Mr. Kuch hits it all the way across the green and the fringe stops his ball from going off the green and into the water. Big giant exhale of relief.

At 15, Mr. Kiz and Signore Molinari both tee off into the right fairway bunker. Why? Will we ever know why? Mr. Kiz sends his shot past the pin all the way across the green. At 2 down, Signore Molinari comes up short of the green, with the pin quite a bit farther in the middle of the green. He chips his third and almost makes it onto the green, then putts from the fringe down beyond the green and just barely gets back up on the green. Signore Molinari misses his putt, and Mr. Kiz burns the edge and his bogie is conceded for tie. Sigh. The 16th will be better surely.

Mr. Kuchar's long birdie putt at 13 is a few feet off, while Mr. B's short birdie attempt is a painful few inches off and still he remains 1 down. At 14, Mr. Kuch hits it in the fairway and Mr. B goes right into some other fairway's bunker behind a concession stand. From the sand, he manages to pitch it right over the hole and spin it back a bit. From the fairway, Mr. Kuch hits it hot into the green and it rolls right by the hole all the way to the back till the fringe stops it. His long birdie attempt burns the left edge leaving inches for par. Mr. B again lips out and misses his chance to win the hole and tie the match. With pars conceded, Mr. Kuch stays 1 up. 

At 16, again Signore Molinari and Mr. Kiz stripe it down the fairway, but this time Mr. Kiz's ball rolls way way past and Signore Molinari now seems not to be driving nearly as far. But Signore Molinari overshoots the hole again and Mr. Kiz shoots from the rough of the first greenside bunker into the next greenside bunker. From the fringe behind the hole, Signore Molinari just misses holing it. From the sand, Mr. Kiz hits it to the rough behind the green and Signore Molinari has won his first hole in a while to cut Mr. Kiz's lead to 1. Maybe these guys are getting a bit fatigued on Day 5, asks someone who doesn't run unless it'd be for life saving purposes.

At 15, Mr. Kuch hit it in the fairway and Mr. B hit it in the rough, but Mr. Kuch left his second shot short, while Mr. B left what should be a birdie putt for himself. And finally he makes a birdie to win a hole and the match is tied as they head to 16.

At the Par 3 17th, Signore Molinari stuffs it right into the front pin. Mr. Kiz bounces it off the fringe in front of the green and gets it stuck in there. He nearly chips it in, but Signore Molinari is in close and makes his putt to win the hole and tie the match again. Jimminy Christmas! 

Both Mr. B and Mr. Kuch stripe it down the Par 5 16th. Mr. Kuch drives the green on his second shot, and Mr B is in the fringe short of the green. He chips from that fringe all the way across the green to the fringe on the right. Mr. Kuch just misses his long eagle and taps in for birdie. Mr. B misses his putt and is 1 down again. Holy Mackerel Sapphire. 

On the Par 4 18th, anyone can win. Signore Molinari hits it right into a fairway bunker, and Mr. Kiz hits it safely down the left side but in a fairway divot. From the sand Signore Molinari sends it well left beyond the hole. Mr. Kiz stuffs it into the hole and ends up a bit right for a great chance to win the semifinals with a birdie. Signore Molinari just misses the hole and goes by it quite a bit again. Mr. Kiz just misses his birdie, and has only inches for par, which is conceded. Signore Molinari still has about 8 feet to extend the match but burns the edge and will play in the consolation match in the afternoon. Hats off to you, gentlemen.

At the Par 3 17th, Mr. Kuch with the honor and the lead by 1 hits it not too far right of the front pin. Mr. B bounces it off the fringe onto the green and not too far left of the hole. Mr. Kuch holes his 17 foot birdie for a rousing round of Kuch from the gallery. Mom asks why I'm booing him and I tell her it's Kuch not Boo! Kuch, Mom says too. Mr. B now must make his birdie to tie the hole and extend the match and darned if he doesn't.Yea!

At the Par 4 18th with the honor and still a lead of 1, Mr. Kuch stripes it down the fairway, and Mr. B ends up a bit behind and left of Mr. Kuch. Mr. B bounces his ball onto the green near the front hole and it boings and rolls well back into the green about 40 feet from the hole. Mr. Kuch hits it just right of the front hole and it checks at about 18 feet, leaving a much better chance of birdie. Mr. B gives it a good rap and misses left and a few more feet, but he did hit it. Mr. Kuch with two putts to win the match leaves the birdie a bit short and Mr. B gallantly concedes the match. "It was a case of survive and advance," Mr. Kuch told Golf Channel. "It was not great golf."

I suppose it wasn't great golf if you could never get more than 1 up in your match, but it was great to watch all the golfers try to survive and advance up and down the gorgeous mountains through WGC-Dell Match Play in the windy Texas cold of 40 Fahrenheit. They all certainly had their magical moments. Next up,  Mr. Kuch and Mr. Kiz will battle it out for the win, and Signore Molinari and Mr. B will spend their afternoon playing the consolation match. The only downside for Mom, Scoob and me is we're missing more golf action at the Corales Punta Cana from the tropical paradise of the Dominican Republic, where the sun shines as brightly as the locals' smiles, and the sea is every variant of turquoise you could ever imagine. Congratulations to Mr. Graeme McDowell for winning in The D.R.: Keep up the good work, Slainte!, and Doo Good and Have Fun, as Scoob E says. I can't help but feel a bit bad for the guys playing their second 18 this afternoon in the WGC consolation match though; whoever wins can only take third place. It's a long afternoon of golf when you're not playing to actually win and it's also impossible to place second in the tournament through treacherous terrain and Texas Cold weather, the kind of weather you'd normally expect at The Open. 

On the upside, it's warmed up there about 5 degrees, but even the wind chill is bigger in Texas. Mr. Kuch again has on his delightful white ski hat bordered in blue and topped with a blue and white pom pom. If it were more white than blue, it would look like Scoob E Dooby D Doge atop Mr. Kuch's hat. Both Mr. Ks stripe it down the fairway at the 1st for a fine start to their title match. They both played collegiate golf in Georgia, but for different schools. But that was decades ago. While I was attending the University of Miami, we had a joke that went Do you know why the St. Johns River flows north? Because Georgia Sucks! But I wrote that decades ago, when the UM football team was #1 in the nation almost all the time, as well as atop Playboy magazine's list of Best Party Schools. Listen, Dad picked the University of Miami for me. I really wanted to go to the University of Florida in Gainesville with all my friends, where only one of the ten got a degree, which is one more than Dad predicted when he sent me to UM, where I did graduate cum laude. I daresay Dad and I did rather enjoy seeing in person the Hurricanes defeat Georgia in the season opener three years in a row. 

Let the WGC Sunday Finals Begin

Mr. Kuch hits the green right on the mound where the hole is cut and it tumbles far far away. Mr. Kiz hits the front of the green and the ball somewhat checks but still rolls by the hole, only about 12 feet, not 3 yards. Mr. Kuch comes up short, and Mr. Kisner holes his birdie to win the first point of the match and set a good tone for himself. At the Par 4 2nd with the honor, for reasons we'll never understand, Mr. Kiz hits it into the ravine down the left side. This ain't NASCAR: nobody watches golf to see balls careen into a ravine and disappear. Mr. Kuch again stripes the fairway and he's right back in it. From the DZ, Mr. Kiz needs to hole it. But from where he drops, he can't see the flag. His shot bounces nonetheless right in front of the pin and all the way to the fringe in back. Mr. Kuch just hits right of the flag, no muss no fuss. With two putts to win, Mr. Kuch sends his birdie putt well by the hole. Mr. Kiz sinks his bogie putt, and Mr. Kuch lips out his par putt. He finally sinks his bogie putt to tie the hole in the wonders of match play. Still both should be proud, because most amateurs couldn't get out of there with the 10 sum of both Mr. Ks' scores. 

Mr. Kiz with the honor and the lead by 1 stripes it way down the Par 4 3rd. A seemingly dazed Mr. Kuch's shot off 3 Tee is saved from the ravine by some kind rocks, which you rarely get to see or say, so that is super sweet. Although Mom did pass down her love of rocks to me, it's not the same kind of kind rocks she's placed since 1977 in our yard. The ravine rocks are kind enough not to send Mr. Kuch tumbling back into the crevasse as he punches it through the rough to the fairway. Mr. Kiz with his second shot just about holes it from the fairway, and his ball rolls a few feet beyond the hole for birdie. Mr. Kuch shoots at the pin and spins it back a bit too, but that's his third shot. Mr. Kiz's birdie attempt burns the edge and par is conceded. Mr. Kuch makes a hard fought par to tie the hole and remain 1 back.

At the Par 3 4th, the pin is on the front right of the green, surrounded by ravine. Mr. Kiz hits well behind and left of the hole, and Mr. Kuch steps up to hit it in closer. Mr. Kiz's long long birdie looks like it's going in all the way before it runs out of speed, as did Mr. Kuch's long birdie, and another hole is tied with pars. Still 1 up with the honor at the Par 4 5th, Mr. Kiz stripes it again. Mr. Kuch drives it way down the middle. Mr. Kiz hits the hill down the front of the green and his ball rolls back down. Mr. Kuch plays to the middle of the green, leaving another long look at birdie. Mr. Kiz putts up to the flag and burns the left edge as the ball rolls by a few feet. Again Mr. Kuch leaves his birdie just short and his par is conceded. Mr. Kiz sends his par putt right and loses the hole and the lead. 

Tied again at the Par 5 6th, Mr. Kuch drives it down the left side of the fairway. Mr. Kiz drives it right down the middle again, and must make that work better for him than at the last, but hits it beyond the grandstands on the left. Interesting "strategery," as an ex-U.S. President from Texas would say. Mr. Kuch keeps it in the fairway with his second shot. After dropping for relief from the temporary grandstands, Mr. Kiz almost holes it again but burns the left edge as the ball inches past the hole a few feet. Mr. Kuch hits into the leading edge of the green and the ball rolls back down into the rough below the front of the green. He chips it a few inches right of the hole and his ball continues on beyond the hole. Now he must make it and he does to force Mr. Kiz to make his birdie putt to win the hole. Kuch. And Mr. Kiz nails it and goes 1 up. Good on you too.

At the Par 3 7th, it would be good for Mr. Kuch to get a hole in one like he did on this hole last year. But with the honor after winning the last, Mr. Kiz bounces it out of the rough through the fringe and back toward the greenside bunker till the fringe stops the ball. Mr. Kuch takes a more direct route toward the pin at the back of the hole by landing his shot softly on the front of the green, leaving another long long super long look at birdie which he would do well not to leave short again, and indeed he does hit it and it goes well right of the hole all the way to the fringe at the back of the green. Mr. Kiz leaves it several feet short as it runs out of steam over a mound on the way to the hole. Mr. Kuch misses right, leaving Mr. Kiz with just his 3 foot par putt to win the hole and he does, going 2 up. 

Again with the win at the last and the honor, Mr. Kiz on the Par 4 8th gets a bounce out of the left rough and back into the fairway. Excellent. Mr. Kuch drives it down the right well past Mr. Kiz. And Mr. Kiz just gets it on the green to the far far right of the left front pin. Mr. Kuch gets his ball to stop at the front of the green in the middle, about half as far to the hole. Mr. Kiz putts uphill to burn the left edge of the hole OH! for inches for par. Mr. Kuch doesn't even get it close as his birdie putt peels way left short of the hole. 

Sigh. Another hole tied with pars.

Mr. Kiz with the honor at the Par 4 9th drives it about halfway down the downhill fairway, and Mr. Kuch ends up just a bit left of Mr. Kiz. It's another nice view downhill over the ravine to the green. Very pretty for fans, but a bit more intimidating from the tee I'd imagine, and Mr. Kiz plays it very safe to the far right of the green. Mr. Kuch hits even farther right, into the greenside bunker. 

Meanwhile at 10, Signore Molinari makes birdie to win the hole and get his lead back up to 3. Mr. B had beat the lead back to 2, but Signore Molinari has been outplaying him throughout much of this consolation match. 

From the sand, Mr. Kuch hits his third shot across the green and many feet past the hole. From the front of the green, Mr. Kiz has about 70 feet for birdie to win the hole and hits it just inside of Mr. Kuch's ball. Mr. Kuch makes his long par putt without flinching, and Mr. Kiz GASP lips out from about 7 feet for bogie, losing the hole and cutting his lead to 1 over Mr. Kuch. 

With the honor at the Par 4 10th, Mr. Kuch sends his ball down the left side of the fairway. Mr. Kiz bounces on down the left as well. Mr. Kiz shoots at the back left hole, but his ball lands short and spins back and much closer to the front of the green. Mr. Kuch lands his shot softly near the hole and it rolls by several feet toward the back of the green. Mr. Kiz has a lot of mounds on the green between him and the hole and leaves his birdie putt a few feet short. Mr. Kuch has a much better shot at birdie to win the hole and get the match going his way but it is not to be, and he taps in for par. Mr. Kiz manages to make his par and retain his 1 up lead. 

One down with the honor at the Par 3 11th, Mr. Kuch would do well to hole it with the flag so close to the water in front of the green. Sigh as Mr. Kuch kersplashes down way short. Aww. Mr. Kiz overdoes it a bit after seeing that as anyone could and sends his ball way past the hole and down off the back of the green. From the DZ, Mr. Kuch gives himself a good chance for bogie as his ball checks several feet beyond the hole. Mr. Kiz decides to putt rather than chip up through the fringe at the back of the green and sends it a few inches right and a few feet past the cup for par to win the hole. Mr. Kuch has seven or eight feet for bogie for any chance but he misses well right and concedes the hole to Mr. Kiz, who makes his par putt anyway for practice in celebration and serenity of getting back to 2 up. 

At the Par 5 12th, Mr. Kiz hits it into the right rough short and right of the fairway bunker. Mr. Kuch sends his tee shot down the middle of the fairway. Mr. Kiz hits it to the fairway in front of the green surrounded by water. Mr. Kuch shoots over the water to get on the middle of the green in two, and the ball checks and rolls just a bit closer to the pin at the back of the green. Mr. Kiz stuffs his third shot several feet right of the pin. Mr. Kuch's eagle attempt burns the right edge of the hole and his birdie is conceded. Mr. Kisner must make his 7 foot birdie putt to tie and he buries the ball in the hole to retain his 2 up lead. Neato, guys.

Surrounded by water at the Par 4 13th, Mr. Kiz hits driver off the deck to get over the water into the middle of the fairway short of the green. Mr. Kuch drives it just beyond Mr. Kiz's ball, deftly avoiding Lake Austin all down the left side of the hole. Mr. Kiz just needs to get on the green but bounces it by the hole and down the back. Mr. Kuch really really needs to just get on the green, but his ball bounces past the hole and down the back of the green as well. Mr. Kuch needs to hole it and chips it to just a few feet short of the hole. Mr. Kiz chooses putter to get back up the green and just outside of Mr. Kuchar's ball. He must make this par to retain his 2 up lead and Mr. Kiz does it again. Wow! The sun which made an appearance a while back has warmed up Austin Country Club enough to let Mr. Kuch replace his ski hat with a baseball cap, while the other players have shed some of their layers finally. 

Lake Austin runs the entire length down the left of the Par 4 14th as well, with a bit of water to the right to make for a sliver of a tee surrounded by water; all week it's looked like the players are teeing off from the end of a very long green dock, which is both beautiful and intimidating which resulting in great sport. Surely with very different visualizations, Mr. Kiz hits it to the right side of the fairway, and Mr. Kuch drives it to the middle of the fairway. From more than 40 yards behind Mr. Kuch, Mr. Kiz waits for the wind to figure in and bounces it off the front right of the green with a good kick and roll toward the hole. Mr. Kuch hits it much farther right of Mr. Kiz, leaving quite a bit of work to tie this hole that he really needs to win. 

In the consolation match meanwhile, Signore Molinari and Mr. B tie the 15th and Mr. B remains 3 down at the 16th, where he's running out of holes. Mr. Kuch nearly holes his birdie at 14 but again is just inches short. Mr. Kiz was in all the way until he too left it inches short and Mr. Kuch returned the courtesy of concession for par to tie the hole. At the Par 4 15th, Mr. Kiz with the honor hits it over the water toward the grandstand on the left. Mr. Kuch is headed for the same grandstand but gets a nice kick off a camera tripod back into the fairway. That could have gone a lot of ways. Funny ol' game is golf. Mr. Kiz may or may not get relief from the hospitality suites, but once the official instructs him to drop, he hits it right at the hole and his ball bounces and stops 20 or 30 feet short. Mr. Kuch right alongside in the fairway also hits it right at the flag but goes farther right and his ball rolls away from the hole and off the green. He should really hole his next shot for birdie if he wants a shot at this championship. Alas he putts well right and well beyond the hole. Mr. Kiz still has a chance at birdie to win the hole and sends it just inches left for a tap in par that's conceded. Mr. Kuch burns the right edge and loses the hole to go 3 down. 

At 16, Signore Molinari wins the consolation match and third place in the championship after Mr. B misses his par putt and concedes Signore Molinari's par. Nicely done and thank you, gentlemen. A very good consolation for Mr. B in the consolation match is that he got to both meet and beat his childhood golf hero Mr. Tiger yesterday to get this far. That's gotta make finishing fourth and last today a bit better for Mr. B, surely. All four of these players should be justifiably proud. 

Next on the Par 5 16th, Mr. Kiz tees off into the right rough short of the trees, while Mr. Kuch hits the middle of the fairway. Mr. Kiz pitches it back down onto the fairway, while Mr. Kuchar bounces his ball onto the front of the green and back toward the hole on the left leaving himself a long eagle putt and another chance. Mr. Kiz hits his third just inside Mr. Kuch's ball for his birdie putt. Oh no. Mr. Kuch again leaves his eagle putt that was in all the way short and birdie is conceded. If Mr. Kiz sinks his birdie he'll win the title because Mr. Kuch is out of holes in which to do so, and again clutch he knocks it around the left rim and down into the hole! Wow! "I prevailed and I'm World Golf Champion. I learned a lot," Mr. Kisner humbly tells Golf Channel after he wins. A super sweet win it is for Mr. Kiz after he lost in a playoff just last year to Mr. Bubba. Congratulations Mr. Kiz on persisting through a windy cold Sunday to take home the Walter Hagen Trophy this year. Good on you. And congratulations to all the other players and their family and teams as well who made for thrilling match play action throughout the championship. There really is nothing like it. We thank all the players, volunteers, spectators, staff, broadcasters, PGA officials, teams, families and locals at Austin Country Club who should be very proud of helping bring everyone five days of magical match play that won't be forgotten any time soon.